Selasa, 20 April 2021

My Feeling around 2 am

 Hi,

(I have just read the old text between me and him, a year ago i got food from him, i was in the mid of meeting and couldn’t buy lunch. He bought it for me)

It's been a while. I am questioning myself a lot.

Am i really ok? Am i just running away from the reality of getting hurt inside?

How hurt the pain inside, i have nothing to do.

Acceptance, i am looking for some answer but it keeps leading me to learn how to accept things peacefully, let it be and learn the real meaning of  “it is what it is”

I have no control for anything.

I keep seeing them smiling and living their best life. I have different feeling now, thought i am getting stronger somehow. But do i really feel fine inside? 

No, i feel sad but the sadness is in different scale or form than before, it feels like uncomfortable wave inside my chest. 

Sometimes i miss the way how they made me feel comfortable, energize and happy. 

I cant lie, curious do they really never think about me? Then the next question will come up, if yes then what? If no then what? Sadly i have to accept. We are no longer at the same bus, we are no longer relate to each other. 


We are back to stranger to each other.


I miss you both.

Dear myself,

How sad, how hurt you are now. Take care and hanging there. I will see you in the future with full and warm heart. We will through this together. You know that i love you so much. I promise to learn more about yourself and taking care of you better.

I am waiting here, to see you with brighter smile from inside your heart.

Love,

Yourself 

Tidak ada komentar:

Posting Komentar